Kids with Sickness: What We've Learned and a Plea for Additional Help

 During the first few months of 2020, my family went through four rounds of colds.The bold, italics, and underlining do not begin to convey the depth of the related negative feelings we had. Throughout that time, I often hoped that we were learning from the experience, so that in the future, especially a future including even more children, it would not be quite so hard to be sick. Well, this year, 2021, we have had several illnesses, and at least a few times I have found myself thinking, “This is horrible, just like last year; we didn’t learn anything.” In fact right now we’re recovering from sickness, along with the distress that comes with decision-making on when to stay home from things based on sickness. But during a nice family home evening lesson a month or so ago my wife asked us to think about what we had learned, and we actually learned quite a bit. I’d like to share what we learned, and plead for additional ideas.

Practical/physical ideas

First I’ll share some practical/physical ideas. For better or worse, I often Google ideas in this category. That can be frustrating, because I really want to find a reliable source that simply recommends a pill or food that makes the cold disappear from my family in a day rather than a month, and I haven’t found that yet. But here are some things that I think help me feel a little bit better: humidifier, oranges, chicken noodle soup (I have celiac disease and I’m happy to share our great gluten-free recipe if you want), pouring honey in my mouth (yum), tylenol/acetaminophen, schedule a doctor appointment before we know we need one so that once we do need one (like for a secondary infection) we don’t have to wait days for availability, and a NoseFrida to suck mucus out of a child’s nose. For especially bad nights we have tried extra pillows, sleeping in a recliner, and cough drops (and, unfortunately, simply bracing myself for little sleep so that I stop worrying so much about falling asleep). 

I had a teeth clenching problem that created especially bad jaw pain with colds. I tried a $10-15 Walmart night guard and it was uncomfortable and didn’t work. Then I got one fitted by a dental office (around $250 dollars out-of-pocket and $250 paid by insurance, so pretty expensive unfortunately) and now I rarely have jaw pain, even during sickness.

Preventing sickness feels even more like trying to catch a fly in the dark than surviving/recovering from sickness, but I suppose we have felt good about occasionally disinfecting toothbrushes, changing pillow cases, and having hand sanitizer at the dinner table.

Spiritual ideas

Now I’ll share some spiritual ideas. I have felt great peace during many middle-of-the-night wake-ups as I have tried my best to connect with Jesus Christ. I believe He, to bless all of God’s children, took “upon him the pains and the sicknesses of his people.” I find peace and purpose in Him as I try to comfort sick children in the night. This connection with Jesus Christ has grown little by little over the years, and I have especially seen it grow as I consistently seek answers from Him and conscientiously try to be patient.

Being outdoors can be helpful in connecting with heaven and feeling that my problems are a little smaller than they feel indoors.

Receiving service and expressions of love from others during sickness helps us feel special, and letting my mind dwell on gratitude for that is nice. I also become extra-motivated to serve others as I want to jump out of my own depths of despair. 

I feel a special call to rise to the occasion of being nice to my family when there is the extra challenge of sickness. Sometimes that means doing less. With less energy, I need to do less criticizing, less whining, less disagreeing, and less talking about myself, and this can all be helpful to family relationships. 

But as noble as that all sounds, I’m still often a moany miserable mess, so this is where you give your advice. I would seriously appreciate it. Not only my family’s health, but our sanity, is on the line. Please share your physical, mental, and spiritual ideas for responding to difficult family circumstances like sickness (and we’re certainly game for simply changing our circumstances so that we don’t get sick anymore, if you know the answer to that). If you are simply thinking that we just have to get used to misery, then please brace us for the future by sharing whether your experience is that sickness is pretty much a constant that you get used to or whether you get used to dealing with bad seasons of the year/phases of childhood. Thanks.